[Bones McCoy]

Did Boris' legendary lack of hours reflect spending time with his children?

[Tubby Isaacs]

Ha ha.

[Tubby Isaacs]

This is encouraging that they know what they're doing.

[Crabcakes]

Sigh. From the Guardian, disappointingly. Headline:

“ Britain will not rejoin EU in my lifetime, says Starmer”

Actual quote:

Asked whether he could see any circumstances where the UK rejoined the single market or customs union within his lifetime, Starmer said: “No. I don’t think that that is going to happen. I’ve been really clear about not rejoining the EU, the single market or the customs union – or [allowing a] return to freedom of movement.”

Saying he doesn’t think I these things will happen and him clarifying none of them are current policy is drastically, drastically different from him saying he will block it, which is how it’s framed.

[Youngian]

We understand why Starmer wants to kick this in the long grass but needs to watch himself as he has no coherent strategy to replace Brexit’s war on economic gravity. Or likely to pull one out of the bag.

[Malcolm Armsteen]

"Tonight I want to talk to you about the critical condition we found the nation's finances to be in when we have come to government and how those disastrous finances have prevented us from following our plans for growth and social justice.
The Tories hid from you the disastrous state we are in.
To save the nation, to preserve the economy, to allow you to earn enough to feed your family we will have to take some difficult decisions.
It has become clear that leaving the EU was a grave mistake. I understand why so many people voted to leave, because they felt that they were being ignored by a distant government. I pledge to you tonight that I will heal that wound.
But I have to tell you that if we are to get back our position as a trading nation, as a vibrant and innovative nation, as a nation which cares for the old and the vulnerable we must make decisions that will disappoint some people.
Accordingly I have instructed Angela Rayner to begin negotiations with the European Union to establish a status similar to that of Norway, and in the fullness of time to gain full membership. I ask you for your support in saving our nation, and I stress that if we do not take this step now the present high levels of unemployment and distress will worsen."

Keir Starmer, July 2026

[Tubby Isaacs]

I think they're going to have played the "now we've opened the books..." card long before then. Bailouts for just about everything that's falling to bits will have needed to happen.

[Killer Whale]

Would EFTA want us?

[Watchman]

Hopefully by then we will have shown that the grown-ups are back in charge

[Abernathy]

That’s certainly an appealing scenario, and not too far away from reality in that Starmer’s Britain from day one will be working to ditch “divergence”, and re-align the UK with EU standards and regulations - in itself a pre-requisite to re-joining the EU/restoring our membership.

I just hope we can do it without anymore of that referendum bollocks. Ted Heath managed it in 1973, and I don’t think the country could or should be subjected to the frightful sturm und drang of that awful 2016 campaign. No doubt the Tories and Farage will be screaming blue murder, and betrayal of the will of the people, but fuck them. Fuck them hard.

[Youngian]

Even without two wars to cope with, it’s going to be a good few years before the EU has the bandwidth and energy to start negotiating with the UK again. Starmer might get a meeting penned in with whatever commissioner is in charge of veterinary measures. Except for defence and security where Britain can be relied on to make a positive contribution instead of tedious half hearted moaning once they’ve signed up.

[Tubby Isaacs]

I don't think some fairly low key bits of trade of mutual interest to both parties are likely to be too much of a problem, are they?

[Youngian]

Hope so but if the UK starts cherry picking a wish list of privileges of SM membership, it’s likely to get the door slammed in its face. And the EU also has little enthusiasm of going back down the Swiss route of bilateral agreements.

[Tubby Isaacs]

This stuff is a gift to the SNP too. Just repeat what the manifesto says. No need for speculating on what might happen when you're 75.

[Malcolm Armsteen]

No doubt the Tories and Farage will be screaming blue murder, and betrayal of the will of the people, but fuck them. Fuck them hard.

With a pineapple.

[Malcolm Armsteen]

Hope so but if the UK starts cherry picking a wish list of privileges of SM membership, it’s likely to get the door slammed in its face. And the EU also has little enthusiasm of going back down the Swiss route of bilateral agreements.

Part of the irony here - from the point of view of the ERG and UKIP - is that the end result of their bitter xenophobia will be the UK in the EU, using the Euro and in the Schengen zone and without all the exceptions and rebates that Thatcher negotiated, because that's what the EU will demand and we will be so fucked we'll have to accept.

[Youngian]

A discussion for another day but don’t be surprised if Euro membership comes back on the political agenda in the next decade. May sound totally fanciful now but not in egghead economics and IR circles.

[Watchman]

No doubt the Tories and Farage will be screaming blue murder, and betrayal of the will of the people, but fuck them. Fuck them hard.

With a pineapple.

Sideways!

[Oboogie]

Would EFTA want us?

No, they've already made that clear.
The only routes into the single market are EU membership or via some bespoke deal.

[Abernathy]

Does anybody know whether we’ve booked the Royal Festival Hall to have Brian Cox playing “Things can Only Get Better” as the dawn breaks ? I’m sure Neil and the Prince of Darkness would still be up for a boogie.