[Bones McCoy]

Littlejohn likes to keep blaming councils but in reality most council services these days have been privatized so it is more likely that it is a private contractor has messed up. When there was some bad flooding in Sheffield some years ago lots of residents were ringing up the local council for not clearing out all the cities gullies. Eventually somebody called in to say that the council used to employ 30 gulley men to do the job but when the service was privatised the company that won the contract only employed 15 gulley men and some of these were employed on a casual basis. Clearly if you employ less people either the job takes much longer or many of the gullies don't get cleared.

This illustrates how privatisations can appear efficient.
Great value, until the day you actually require the service.

[Andy McDandy]

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/debate/arti ... rexit.html

Littlecock 'does' the Covid enquiry, by riffing on Peter Cook's "Entirely a Matter for You" monologue. Which is a bit like asking Paul Thomas to 'do' Bruegel.

Thing is, the original Cook skit was about acquitting an apparently very guilty man in the face of overwhelming evidence. But here:

Mr Hancock has still not provided a satisfactory explanation as to how contracts for hundreds of millions of pounds of PPE equipment were awarded to Tory donors with no previous medical supplies experience. I speak specifically of a Mr Arthur Daley, managing director of Daley Into Europe Inc, which operates out of a lock up in Acton; and Mr Derek Trotter, proprietor of Trotter's Independent Traders, which has branches in New York, Paris and Peckham. Mr Daley and Mr Trotter are, as far as I can make out, complete and utter crooks.

Billions of pounds were wasted on PPE which never arrived or was unfit for purpose. But we have been unable to verify wilder allegations that public money intended for the NHS was diverted to more nefarious items of expenditure, including the purchase of several rolls of expensive gold wallpaper and the provision of prosecco and birthday cake for illicit gatherings in No 10 Downing Street.

Which brings me the evidence of the defendant, Boris Johnson. You may choose to believe the testimony of this philandering fantasist and his arrogant dismissal of all the charges against him as a merely an inverted pyramid of piffle.

You may think him the most discredited, embittered, most unreliable, most dishonest, most economical-with-the-actualité witness ever to have sullied a witness box in any court of law in this country, let alone to have become Prime Minister and aspiring President of the World.

You may, on the other hand, care to regard him as a true, selfless Churchillian patriot, a man who saved Britain from Covid and Got Brexit Done.

That, ladies and gentlemen, is entirely a matter for you. You poor deluded fools.

Boris Johnson taking Britain out of the EU did more damage than coronavirus and it is for that, rather than any mistakes he may or may not have made during the pandemic, that he must be severely punished.

And on that sole count, ladies of gentlemen of the jury, you must now retire to consider your verdict of... GUILTY!

After reading which, I thought, is Littlejohn acknowledging that all that shit happened on Johnson's watch, but it's OK because he got fucking Brexit done? That they're only going after him because of Brexit and not the fucking thousands of deaths, the billions of looted money, the trashing of every standard in public life? The ultimate "Yeah but he's a mate..."? That would take some sort of moral vacuum stretching from here to Pluto.

Then I thought, "Littlejohn. Yeah."

Malcolm, the catchphrase please!

[Bones McCoy]

Looks like Johnson's lost the Rothermere vote.

[davidjay]

Looks like Johnson's lost the Rothermere vote.

It seems to me more like Dickie's gone for the "They're all after him because they're all Remainers" line.

[satnav]

They put this caption under a picture of Lee Cain

Lee Cain, one of Boris Johnson's closest and longest-serving aides, resigned in November 2020 amid anger at the government's handling of the pandemic. He also criticised his former boss

I thought Cain actually left because Johnson wanted to make him his chief of staff but Carrie and other No.10 insiders opposed the appointment.

[Andy McDandy]

Double dose, sorry.

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/debate/arti ... ailey.html

In part one, he pretends to have been a roving reporter covering the US primaries. And not just watching TV. No real insight, just that Biden will probably be replaced by someone younger, and that the GOP are as mad as a box of frogs. America's bad but it's nowhere near as bad as Bri....ah, hang on, actually, it's worse.

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/debate/arti ... harge.html

In part 2, it's as you'd expect. Posh boys in charge, Brexit betrayal, wasted chances, bring back Boris, they're all the same (so vote for this lot).

Tired, busted, crap.

[Malcolm Armsteen]

The 'they're all the same' schtick really angers me, because it resonates with the bottom third of the gene pool (because it requires no thought-effort) and they either don't vote or don't critically consider the alternatives. So we end up with more of the same shit.

[davidjay]

"They're all the same" = Embarrassed Tory.

[Andy McDandy]

It's a bit like first draft of history vs tomorrow's chip wrapper. One minute you're At Last, the Politician who Gets It, the next you're Just Another No-Mark, in it For Themselves.

Thing is, as James O'Brien's new book neatly points out, all these issues that are apparently of no concern to normal people, such as politics and "wokery", get a hell of a lot of coverage from the likes of the Mail and Littlejohn. Although it's not so much "not an issue" as "don't want to hear the opposing view".

[Youngian]

The 'they're all the same' schtick really angers me, because it resonates with the bottom third of the gene pool (because it requires no thought-effort) and they either don't vote or don't critically consider the alternatives. So we end up with more of the same shit.

Advocates of this POV raise some questions:
Why is everyone who enters public service corrupt while you’re so virtuous?
Ever thought of going to Washington yourself, Mr Smith?
Most people active in politics have delivered leaflets on a wet Wednesday evening for nothing, any ideas as to what motivates them?

[Youngian]

"They're all the same" = Embarrassed Tory.

No only Tories. There’s “they’re all the same” but Jeremy’s different. If you want to be loved in politics, don’t step up to make a difference as it means making choices that will piss some people off. Just spend your career sniping at those who do.

[Amazonian]

From its latest effort (no, I'm not linking that shite):

Sacking Suella Braverman as Home Secretary was a surrender to the woke Whitehall Blob and the Remainer rump on the Conservative backbenches. No wonder arch-EU fanatic Michael Heseltine was crowing last night: 'We've got our party back.'

Oh yeah, only Remainers and 'fanatics' were disgusted by Braverman. Go fuck yourself, Littledong.

[Andy McDandy]

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/debate/arti ... itain.html

Boo! Lawyers! Telling us what we can and can't do! Separation of powers? Rule of law? Faaack off! It's the wrong sort of law! It's a law made by British peop....the wrong sort of British people.....we want honest, decent, traditional law, made by successive generations of stout yeomen plodding along the lanes of merrie England, cudgelling Gypsies over their heads.

Cunt.

[Youngian]

Witless as ever

The deportation scheme may be bonkers, born of desperation, and apparently based on the old Beach Boys hit: Help me Rwanda, help, help me Rwanda.

[Andy McDandy]

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/debate/arti ... ities.html

More bollocks about wind farms. Boring cunt.

[Killer Whale]

Don't fucking start me on suburban-dwellers moving out to the deep countryside and expecting it both to be 'unspoilt' and to provide all mod cons. Also, if you're going to buy yourself a trophy fucking 4x4, at least learn how to fucking drive it. Especially in reverse. Fuck off.

Sorry. I think I might need a bit of a lie down.

[Youngian]

What are installing more cable lines via pylons got to do with net zero fanatics? Hard to believe he’s becoming even more moronic.

[Killer Whale]

What are installing more cable lines via pylons got to do with net zero fanatics? Hard to believe he’s becoming even more moronic.

Because with coal power, the power stations were built near the coal fields, with gas turbines, the power stations could be built near conurbations. With renewables, power sources are potentially more remote, so new connections to the grid are required, which means running pylons where they didn't used to be. Sometimes where Mail readers live, or have moved to in order to escape the modern world*.

*Brown people.

[davidjay]

What are installing more cable lines via pylons got to do with net zero fanatics? Hard to believe he’s becoming even more moronic.

It's part of the "Used to be fields all round here" idyll that his ilk hark back to as part of their Everything's Gone to Rack and Ruin (But We Can't Say Why Even Though We All Know The Real Reason).

[Youngian]

Not a noted conservationist but Bozo and Carrie are. He probably picked the John of Gaunt bollocks up from a Johnson countryside speech.