- Tue Oct 18, 2022 1:35 pm
#33891
Marina Hyde is on smoking form today - although I'm surprised that she filed her copy this early, given the circumstances:
Earlier, temporarily released from her oubliette, the PM had put out a tweet. “The British people rightly want stability,” this began, “which is why we are addressing the serious challenges we face in worsening economic conditions. We have taken action to …” No, sorry, I haven’t got the strength to reproduce the thing in full. Long story short: she’s pissed down your back, and now she’s telling you it’s raining.
Anyway, on to Hunt, clearly the more operational figure. Many of us will have spent far too long yesterday watching the new chancellor’s already unsettling twitch of slightly opening his eyes in a slightly startled fashion, slightly more often than every five seconds. I really don’t want to think of Jeremy as a chess grandmaster whose moves are being dictated by the markets via vibrating anal beads. But since I have, you must too.
If you’d told any of us this time a week ago that Jeremy Hunt would be chancellor – apparently in the German sense – then we’d have struggled to get our heads round it. I mean, he’s already died in two timelines (once in the 2019 leadership contest and once in the one earlier in the summer). In our new timeline, austerity is both still happening and about to happen all over again. The narrative threads of the current political crisis are now so completely nutso that you have to conclude the Conservative Cinematic Universe has officially entered its multiverse era. Only the true fanboys can explain it.
Of course, the key difference is that the long-term governing party is not on to a winner with this. Whereas Marvel have found a way to almost guarantee money from the notoriously unpredictable movie business, the Conservatives have managed to preside over a period from 2016 in which the UK economy contracted from being 90 % the size of Germany’s to now being just 70%. Eventually the sole remaining business in our economy will be the hipster trade in ironic In Liz We Truss mugs. I don’t know if this was forecast by any of Truss’s wingnut economists, but I guess it’s called growth? (Incidentally, speaking of Liz’s spirit economists and thinktank army, do now settle in for literally decades of them whining that the problem with their ideas was that they weren’t done properly, like communism or Brexit.)
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"Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away."
- Philip K. Dick
- Philip K. Dick