[Malcolm Armsteen]

Where is he? Answers on a postcard...

Is he on hidden manouvres?
Is he in rehab?
Has he been caught playing away?*
Has he had a breakdown?
Has he discovered shame?

*When I suggested this to Mrs A she made a noise like a cat bringing up a hairball.

[Bones McCoy]

Down the Winchester, lying low till it all blows over.

This is the guy who brought Cummings into Westminster, stabbed Alexander in the front and spends far too much time around think tanks.
But 12 months out of the public eye, and his mates in the press will buff him up to look like Johnson's successor.

[Malcolm Armsteen]

That makes sense, rather frighteningly.

So No.1

[Bones McCoy]

[visage]

Where is he? Answers on a postcard...

Is he on hidden manouvres?
Is he in rehab?
Has he been caught playing away?*
Has he had a breakdown?
Has he discovered shame?

*When I suggested this to Mrs A she made a noise like a cat bringing up a hairball.

Definitely not the second option, according to an eyewitness I know.

[Malcolm Armsteen]

Apparently he's in Israel, discussing Covid passports. Why that needs two people (plus entourage and coke dealers) flying halfway across the world I don't know. Could easily be a Zoom.

[Andy McDandy]

Thing about Zoom calls is that they can be recovered. Shit's going down under the table. Arms deals would be my guess.

[Malcolm Armsteen]

Interesting bit in the latest Popbitch email:

>> A house divided? <<
What's happening in Westminster?

There's already a pretty hefty amount of sleaze and suspicion sloshing around Westminster at the minute, and it seems as though Fleet Street may have a new story to toss into the trough too. Lobby hacks were asking some rather pointed questions about rumoured ministerial use of a grace-and-favour flat in Admiralty Arch at a briefing this week.

Though details were sparse, it's unlikely to relate to the Johnson/Arcuri affair that's back in the news – because the shagging in that took place at their own residences. It's unlikely to be connected to any of David Cameron's recent lobbying efforts either – as he's no longer a minister.

So who could it be? And could this have anything to do with the persistent Westminster rumour that there's been a rift in the once unshakeable Gove-Vine union?

[kreuzberger]

That's just pungent tittle-tattle and remember, everyone is entitled to a bit of privacy, whoever they are.

Except for those two. So, please repost anything and everything just as soon as it becomes available.

[Oboogie]

Could it really be Gove? I find it barely plausible that he persuaded one woman to go to bed with him, two is surely taking the piss?

[Malcolm Armsteen]

Apparently as well as being a massive prick he has a massive prick. (Popbitch again).

[Andy McDandy]

Isn't there a rumour that he and Vine are sex swappers? Pity the fool who gets their car keys.

[Bones McCoy]

Isn't there a rumour that he and Vine are sex swappers? Pity the fool who gets their car keys.

Make your excuses and leave territory...

[Bones McCoy]

Could it really be Gove? I find it barely plausible that he persuaded one woman to go to bed with him, two is surely taking the piss?

They wouldn't be Tories if they had good taste.

Is it possible that Mikey's opened a second front with the DUP?

[The Red Arrow]

Having spent most of the day preparing and cooking my favourite meal, and just about to serve up, I suddenly find myself not hungry anymore.

[kreuzberger]

Having spent most of the day preparing and cooking my favourite meal, and just about to serve up, I suddenly find myself not hungry anymore.

Was it the thought of Arlene and Sarah scissoring to fuck while doing beak off the peak of Arlene's driver's cap while, as a dab hand at hitting moving targets, he cracks one off over their breasts?

Aye, that'll be it.

[The Red Arrow]

Anyone fancy a lamb bhuna with all the trimmings? I'm not going to touch it.

[Boiler]

Can you attach it to a PM? I'll have it if so.

[Bones McCoy]

Anyone fancy a lamb bhuna with all the trimmings? I'm not going to touch it.

Better send a bucket...

[Oboogie]

Having spent most of the day preparing and cooking my favourite meal, and just about to serve up, I suddenly find myself not hungry anymore.

Was it the thought of Arlene and Sarah scissoring to fuck while doing beak off the peak of Arlene's driver's cap while, as a dab hand at hitting moving targets, he cracks one off over their breasts?

Aye, that'll be it.

You're not a well man Kreuzy. Seek help.