[Watchman]

I assume this is “satisfaction” in current role, and not in the possibility of doing a satisfactory job as PM

[Youngian]

Ben Wallace gets recognised for doing the job he’s supposed to be doing. You go to the top of the board just for being a Tory Geoff Hoon

[Andy McDandy]

A war in which it's very unlikely any British personnel will be directly at risk. Lots of nice arms sales. One against a clear aggressor too. A defence secretary's dream, I'd imagine.

[Crabcakes]

Rumour has it, 54 letters has been reached…

[Boiler]

Rumour has it, 54 letters has been reached…

He'll survive. I can put up with that if I know for sure that come the GE, he'll be DESTROYED, as the modern vernacular seems to be.

I just hope there's a good strategist at Labour HQ playing the part of The Recording Angel, ready to use all their misdemeanours should the Tories choose to fight dirty.

[Tubby Isaacs]

What's Johnson's role in the jubilee? Any scope for him to do a Fred Mulley?

[Youngian]

The 54 letters further wounds his authority but he’ll squat to the bitter end like Corbyn and Trump.
Wouldn’t lose any sleep over a Nixonian level dirty tricks campaign being heaped on the Tories.

[Tubby Isaacs]

Or like Major. He was a way better politician and man than Johnson (albeit grimly austere), but he only beat Redwood by 218-89. That was a pretty bad result.

[Tubby Isaacs]

Only a fool or a charlatan would cite one quarter's figures and generalise. But it's a fool and a charlatan that we're up against, so here goes.

Bad reading for the government of level uppers. And for Sadiq Khan, who'll be cursing that his plan to "destroy London" isn't working.

[Tubby Isaacs]

In fairness, the North East was the best in the quarter before. But who's being fair?

[Tubby Isaacs]

Lord Geidt isn't happy. If Labour aren't all over this, with their independent ethics investigation idea, they're missing a trick.

[Tubby Isaacs]

Great argument here. I thought the manifesto was what you ran on, not a nod and a wink that the PM is a wrong un.

[Bones McCoy]

[Tubby Isaacs]

This couldn't happy, surely? Johnson going to the country because he was in a bit of trouble in his own party would make Heath's "Who Governs?" look like a winning strategy.

[Abernathy]

Twitter is crawling with rumours. Johnson has apparently been dipping his bread in Nadine’s honey pot (yes, really), and in response Carrie Symonds has left Johnson to take up with Zac Goldsmith.

You could not make it up, to use Littlecock’s favourite phrase.

[Spoonman]

Twitter is crawling with rumours. Johnson has apparently been dipping his bread in Nadine’s honey pot (yes, really), and in response Carrie Symonds has left Johnson to take up with Zac Goldsmith.

You could not make it up, to use Littlecock’s favourite phrase.

Conservative family values.

[Bones McCoy]

Twitter is crawling with rumours. Johnson has apparently been dipping his bread in Nadine’s honey pot (yes, really), and in response Carrie Symonds has left Johnson to take up with Zac Goldsmith.

You could not make it up, to use Littlecock’s favourite phrase.

I wish somebody would make up a full imperial gallon of mind bleach after that rumour.

[Youngian]

Twitter is crawling with rumours.

Top sources

[Boiler]

Bubbles would be an improvement.

[Boiler]

Twitter is crawling with rumours. Johnson has apparently been dipping his bread in Nadine’s honey pot (yes, really), and in response Carrie Symonds has left Johnson to take up with Zac Goldsmith.

You could not make it up, to use Littlecock’s favourite phrase.

I wish somebody would make up a full imperial gallon of mind bleach after that rumour.

Not enough.