Mailwatch(ed) Forum

Apparently Johnson was ‘fired’ partway through because he kept plugging his book even though asked not to.

He was struggling up against an onslaught from Maitliss and Stormy Daniels
https://x.com/implausibleblog/status/18 ... Igslw&s=19

Youngian wrote: ↑Wed Nov 06, 2024 10:45 am He was struggling up against an onslaught from Maitliss and Stormy Daniels
https://x.com/implausibleblog/status/18 ... Igslw&s=19

That's an onslaught I could work with.

I like this tweet from Tim Shipman.

Queen Elizabeth II thought Boris Johnson "better suited to the stage" than politics and two days before her death, after he resigned, she told a senior courtier in jest: "At least that idiot won't be organising my funeral."

I will forever believe she held on to avoid him being leader when she died.

...and then possibly coming to the realisation that she was unlikely to see out Truss' premiership. Miscarkulated, as it were.

Credit to her at least she remained rather ambiguous.

I can’t imagine what Johnson would have been like.

Remarkably, this absurd opinion coming from the man who regularly used to get out of a ministerial car and run 10 metres to try and fool people he’d been out jogging, and who increasingly resembles a particularly poorly made blancmange, is not a spoof (paywalled, but you can get the gist from the headline alone)

https://www.thetimes.com/uk/politics/ar ... -j2bq73dq6?

Highlights:

Boris Johnson has blamed the Church of England for Britain’s obesity crisis, saying that its failure to provide people with the “spiritual sustenance” they need was leading people to “gorge themselves”.

The former prime minister said that when he was younger it was “very rare for there to be a fatso in the class. Now they’re all fatsos, and I’d be shot for saying they’re fatsos, but it’s the truth.”

He criticised the Most Rev Justin Welby and other religious leaders for going on about slavery reparations rather than addressing “people’s spiritual needs”.

Johnson said that higher levels of obesity among children was the result of people being told that there were “paedophiles everywhere”.

He said: “When I was a kid, we were all out playing in the streets the whole time. You don’t see that with kids nowadays … Now they’re all fatsos, and I’d be shot for saying they’re fatsos, but that’s the truth.

“People were skinnier, they ran around a huge amount, they drank phenomenal quantities of Tizer, they ate Spangles and Curly Wurlies and dog s*** … but they expended far more energy and nowadays kids are sitting on screens and being told that it’s all too dangerous to go outside because there are paedophiles everywhere apparently.

“Religious leaders, as well as politicians, they think, ‘what is up with people that they plainly are seeking solace in something that they know is self-destructive’. And when did you last hear the Archbishop of Canterbury preach a sermon about that?

“You know, there he is… droning on about how we’re all guilty and we must all be more left wing.”

Johnson recounted a recent visit to church with his family. “I went to church yesterday, I was one of about ten people. Well, I mean 15 if you added up my family. It was all about how rich men can’t go through the eye of a needle, all that sort of pot.

CUNT

To much fear mongering about paedophiles from the CoE. Not great timing.
Noticed here in Wisbech has a high proportion of kids who walk to school and have wondered if a lot have East European parents who grew up without scare mongering British media so are a bit old school. You walk it'll do you good.

Is there any reason for that tripe other then the current pile-on towards Justin Welby?

Ah, there you have put your finger on it. It's Bunterism, the kid who hasn't got the courage to bully, but will join in when others do it.
Johnson to a T.

He talks about wanting spiritual sustenance, then dismisses the actual teachings of his religion's founder as "all that sort of pot".

He doesn't want spirituality, he wants to be wanked off.

Also, I’m pretty sure no children have ever happily eaten dog shit.

(I can only assume he’s basing that on some Bullingdon club admission ritual.)

It's the old Lee and Herring nostalgia routine, half remembered and regurgitated. Do you remember Spangles? Weren't Curly-Wurlies bigger? Where did all the white dog shit go? Remember Cresta blue pop? What was all that about?

Aren't the Johnsons high Tory Catholics? Perhaps Bozo's been watching Wolf Hall and reminded why he's not a proper land owning toff who doesn't have to buy his own furniture.

He married most recently in Westminster Cathedral because she says she's Catholic, and he's not the sort who'd soil himself by going into a registry office.

He's not religious. He goes through the motions for appearances' sake, but he's the sort of cunt JC hated.

Kids don't go out playing much these days because many of the playing fields they used to play on are now housing estates. Roads are also a lot busier than they were years ago which means parents are more reluctant to let kids go out to play.

Johnson conveniently forgets that in recent years local councils have also been forced to close lots of leisure centres and swimming pool as a result of cuts in central government funding.

But it is so much easier to blame the Church of England.

Johnson said that higher levels of obesity among children was the result of people being told that there were “paedophiles everywhere”.

And who was it who told them that? Murdoch media, that's who. That Rebecca Whatsherface of the News of the World was obsessed with them. So much that it led to the Brass Eye "Paedogeddon" spoof.

While it is true that religion is at the root of many evils in this world, it is a fact that the enshittification of British life over the last decade and a half has got absolutely fuck-all to do with the CofE. Johnson might want to look a bit closer to home for that one.